Give A Little: Come On Get Happy
The quest for happiness has always been a source of discussion - from ancient Greek philosophers like Plato and Aristotle to modern filmmakers like Tom Shadyac. We are constantly looking for what will make us happy. Madison Avenue advertising executives have convinced many of us that the secret to happiness can be found in our next purchase. On Saturday or Sunday afternoons in the Fall, many sports fans will tell you that their happiness depends on the success of “their” team. Gurus and life coaches tend to espouse the idea that happiness is found from within. While that may be closer to the truth, it does not capture the full story. Yet, scientists have determined another path to happiness - giving.
Researchers Lara Aknin, J. Kiley Hamlin, and Elizabeth Dunn at the University of British Columbia found that toddlers under the age of two display more happiness when giving treats to others than when receiving treats themselves, and are happiest of all when the treat given away is their own rather than one provided for the purpose. My own obsession with my pacifier as a toddler serves as personal evidence of the research. My mother had tried without any success to break me of the habit of sucking on my beloved pacifier. One day, she told me that my pacifier was needed for another child, who did not have one. She said I immediately surrendered it without a fuss or asking after it again. If you know me, you know that I have never been quiet about expressing displeasure, so I have to assume the simple act of giving it to someone else made me happy.
Harvard Business School professor Michael Norton and his colleagues Elizabeth Dunn and Lara Aknin have determined that how we spend our money plays a big role in our happiness. In extensive studies, they found that spending on others - even if it is a small amount like five dollars - makes someone happier than spending the same amount on themselves. They define this type of spending as prosocial spending, because initially it appears to benefit someone else. Yet, this type of spending goes beyond just benefitting the recipient by creating observable physical changes to both the body and brain of the giver in areas of the brain associated with pleasure. These effects are known as the warm glow.
Jorge Moll, a neuroscientist at the National Institute of Health, provides even more details regarding the happiness benefits of philanthropy. According to his research, when someone engages in philanthropy the brain releases neurotransmitters that make the giver “feel good” in what Moll describes as the “helper's high.” As part of this “helper's high,” the brain actually releases the hormones oxytocin and vasopressin, which are often used to induce prosocial behaviors and decrease pain. In his research, Moll saw a distinct physical benefit to people when they were helping others in some way. Dr. Sonja Lyubomirsky found similar results in that helping others by volunteering, which is giving your time and skills and not money, also activated areas of the brain associated with pleasure.
Scientific journals are not the only evidence of the benefits of giving. Religious beliefs from every major religion also highlight the benefits of giving. John D. Rockefeller began his philanthropic efforts based on the Christian concept of tithing or giving 10% of your income to others. Judaism specifies giving as an act of justice through the tzedakah, which is a moral obligation to help others. Maimonides, a 12th century rabbi known for his teaching, created philanthropic structures and levels based on the intent of the giver. Zakat, translated loosely as charity, is one of the five core pillars of Islam, as important as praying. Buddhism labels giving as one of the Ten Perfections required for true enlightenment. Hinduism has both giving (Dana) and selfless service (Seva). When all major world faiths espouse one activity as a path to a meaningful life, then it can be assumed that there are benefits for the giver.
Giving does not just promote happiness and pleasure. According to sociologist Christine Carter, it also reduces anxiety and depression. In helping someone else, our brains produce and release serotonin, a neurotransmitter in all animals that is believed to be the primary contributor to feelings of happiness and contentment. Increased serotonin has also been linked to alleviating stress. Mutual aid societies in the 1800s and early 1900s created organizations like the Freemasonry, in which members paid in sums to help other members in times of need. We might think of these organizations as the analog versions of GoFundMe. Giving connects us to others in ways similar to a family might. We are able to create a circle of support.
The act of giving actually provides as many or more benefits to the giver than to the receiver. Giving connects us to others, enables us to have deeper and more meaningful relationships, increases our wealth, and makes us happier.
A dear pastor friend of mine uses the prayer of St. Francis as his weekly benediction. The prayer specifically names the opposite of what we think we need or want and indicates that by doing that, we actually get what we need. For example, it says that “it is in giving that we receive.” When we give, even in some cases without the best intentions, the gifts we give cannot help but come back to us in a way that creates joy.
Madison Avenue has to work hard to create a culture of “retail therapy,” because it requires significant effort to counteract the scientific, theological, and human notions that the best path to our own happiness is actually making someone else happy. The next time that we are seeking happiness rather than looking to others or engaging in “retail therapy,” perhaps we should simply do something kind for someone else, which will create our own happiness.
Fullanthropy Perspective:
The next time you're building your case for support, don't ask what you need from your donors. Show them what they get. The evidence is stacked in your favor. Giving isn't a sacrifice you're asking them to make. It's a genuine path to their own happiness, one that toddlers, neuroscientists, and nearly every major faith tradition have already confirmed.
Ready to explore what a giving mindset could mean for your organization's culture? Chart Your Impact™ to highlight the assets you already have to increase a donor's joy.